Too much for someone too little

While reading my book, at some points in the biography, it was very confusing.  At one point, she was describing what she was doing and then all of a sudden she would be describing something in her past.  I apologize if while you are reading my blog, you get a little confused.  The best tip I can give you is whenever there is a date, it is more in the present and when there is no date available, it is when Nujood is describing something further in her past.  For example, in my previous blog I wrote about the town of Khardji, well that was a part where Nujood was just talking and explaining stuff from her past, but when I wrote about her court appearance on April 2^nd, 2008 well that was something that was happening more in the present. 

Retell:

February 2008.

Mona and Nujood would always stroll along Hayle Avenue, looking through the windows of the beautiful shops admiring the expensive dresses.  Spending a day along Hayle Avenue was one of Nujood’s favourite things to do.  While looking through the window displays, Nujood always admired a beautiful white wedding gown.  It was a dress fit for a lady.  Nujood knew that on her wedding day, she wanted a dress exactly like that one.  Nujood didn’t know much about weddings, she just liked that there was chocolate, jewellery and lots of presents.  She knew that they received a new house, a new life, but she didn’t know what went on after the ceremony. 

Once back home, the news came out of nowhere.  Nujood found out she was getting married off to someone she didn’t even know.  At first she thought it was an escape from her family life which had become impossible, but boy was she wrong.  After her father lost his sweeper job, Nujood’s family didn’t have a lot of money anymore.  Most of the meals they ate now had become a vegetarian version of what they ate before, because they couldn’t afford meat.  The last time Nujood had a good meal, was when her cousin invited the family to a restaurant.  She was able to eat hardy meal and drink some “Bebsi”, a black soda from America, a drink she liked very much.  Since money had gotten so bad, Nujood and her siblings would have to go into the streets and tap on car windows to beg for some spare change. 

Earlier that day, while her dad was sitting outside chewing some khat, green leaves that are chewed into a ball, a man came to him and proposed his idea of uniting their families.  His name was Faez Ali Thamer; he worked as a deliveryman, carrying packages on his motorcycle.  He was also originally from Khardji, Nujood’s family’s village, and he was looking for a new wife.  Since Jamila and Mona were already married off, Nujood was the next in line.  That evening, Mona argued with her father telling him Nujood was way too young, but his mind was already made up.  Nujood’s father thought he was protecting her.  He told Mona that Faez was a known man in the neighbourhood, he comes from Khardji and he promised not to touch Nujood until she was older.  Mona still didn’t sit straight with the idea of her ten year old little sister getting married off to some man three times her age. 

The preparations for the wedding were happening very fast.  On top of knowing that she would have to leave her family, Nujood was told by her new in-laws that she would have to leave her school a month before the wedding day.  She was devastated.  She told Malak, her best friend, goodbye and that was the last time she saw her.  Nujood realized that she was leaving everything behind to marry some man, named Faez Ali Thamer, which she didn’t even know. 

It was Nujood’s wedding day.  The wedding was celebrated by the women at Nujood’s parent’s house and the men at one of her uncle’s house.  During the celebration, Nujood sat in the corner, face swollen from crying so much, she didn’t know why anyone would be celebrating such a horrid tragedy.  Two days earlier, the marriage contract was signed and once again, there were only men present.  None of the women knew what was going on, not even Nujood, the one being married off in the first place.  Later that night, Nujood heard her father telling her mother not to worry, since they made Faez, Nujood’s new husband, promise not to touch her before the year after she has her first period.  Even after hearing that, Nujood was still not reassured.  That night was Nujood’s last night in her parent’s house; she laid on her bed hoping that the next day wouldn’t be the beginning of a nightmare. 

The next morning, when she heard the car horn, she knew it was time to go.  Nujood walked outside and saw a man in white with a moustache, short wavy hair, brown eyes, a poorly shaved face and hands covered in grease.  It was her new husband; she thought he was absolutely atrocious.  As she got into the car, she wondered who was her husband, why did he want her, what was he expecting from her and what exactly was marriage?  As the car started to drive away, Nujood watched her mother growing smaller and smaller as she got further and further away.  Hours later, the car stopped.  They had arrived.  Once out of the car, Nujood realized that they were in Khardji, her old village.  All her old memories from living there came rushing back.  While looking around, there it stood.  It was Nujood’s new house, I wouldn’t call it home.  It had four bedrooms, a living room, a tiny kitchen and a toilet outside behind some bushes.  She thought it was awkward how no one thought it was weird that she was there, at her age.  Turns out there is an old tribal proverb saying “To guarantee a happy marriage, marry a nine year-old girl”, so everyone thought it was fairly normal for her to be there. 

Once the sun had set, Nujood was shown to her new room.  There was a long woven mat lying in the middle of the room, it was her new bed.  Nujood quickly fell asleep.  (The ending of this paragraph will talk about when Nujood was raped.  It you are very sensitive towards this subject, I suggest you skip towards the next paragraph: April 9, 2008) Suddenly the door to her room crashed open; she had barely opened her eyes when she felt a damp, hairy body pressing against her.  It was her husband; she recognized the awful smell of cigarettes and khat on him.  He began to rub himself against her body.  She begged for him to stop, but he replied “You are now my wife; you will do as I say!”  She managed to get to her feet and she started running away.  Then suddenly he grabbed her and brought her back to the room.  He pushed Nujood down to the floor.  She felt paralyzed, as if she was tied down.  She started screaming, hoping someone would come and save her, but she was on her own.  When he took off his white tunic, Nujood rolled into a ball to protect herself, but he began pulling at her clothing starting to undress her.  He started running his hands all over her body.  Nujood felt something burning, a burning she had never felt before, invading the deepest part of her.  She was in excruciating pain and suddenly she lost consciousness.

April 9, 2008

 Shada, that was her name.  She was the woman who was ready and determined to defend Nujood.  She was her lawyer and she specialized in women’s rights cases.  Nujood thought she was beautiful, her skin glowed, her lipstick made her look chic and when she wore glasses, she looked like a movie star.  She also didn’t wear a veil; she wasn’t the typical Yemen woman.  Once Nujood, Shada, Judge Abdo, Judge Mohammad and Judge Abdel were in Judge Abdel’s office, they started talking.  Judge Mohammad was worried.  He stated to explain how it would be very hard for Nujood to win her case.  He explained how they are many obstacles that will need to be overcome.  For example, Nujood didn’t even have a birth certificate, she technically didn’t exist. 

The next three days were somewhat the same.  Nujood would go to the courthouse and hope for a miracle.  She was worried that it was taking so long, but she was warned that her case was difficult and unusual.  She tried to be as patient as she could.  Shada once told her “Nujood, you are like a daughter to me.  I will not abandon you.”  It was the first time she felt the maternal tenderness her mother never gave or didn’t have time to give her.  It was the first time she had hope. 

Relate:

As this point in the biography, I find it very hard to relate to Nujood.  The only thing I realized that we have in common is that we are both very determined girls.  I know that when I want something, I will try my absolute hardest to get it.  Nujood is also the same way, she might be even more determined in her situation than I’ll ever be.  She was able to risk everything and escape from her abusive husband, which makes me wonder if I would ever be able to be as determined and courageous as she is.  I am pretty sure that when I was at her age, I was not as determined as she is.  She knows exactly what she wants and she’ll make sure she gets it.  Even though she might be a ten year old girl, she’ll do what it takes to get that divorce from her horrible monster of a husband.  Other than that one quality, I don’t really think Nujood and I can relate.  She’s been through to many bad situations to count and the worst thing that has ever happened to me was probably me breaking a bone.  I am truly grateful for that.  Knowing how good my life is in Canada, it is very hard at times reading her story.  At around the end of chapter 4: The wedding, Nujood started to talk about how she was raped and at times I didn’t know if I could continue on reading.  How could I relate to something so horrible?  No offense, but I am actually glad to say I cannot relate, but I also feel so bad because the little girl is all on her own.  I couldn’t wish the pain she has been through on anyone. 

Reflect:

I have learned a lot while reading Nujood’s biography.  I’ve learned that people in this world can be so cruel.  Reading this biography and just listening to the news, I kind of given up on humanity.  How could someone possibly think raping a ten year old girl is alright?  How can the human race fail like that?  It is absolutely horrible.  What is going on in people’s heads these days?  While losing hope in humanity, I have also gained a little hope.  During her hardest times, a child has risen to the top.  She gives me hope.  She might be younger than me, but she definitely is one of my role models.  How many people do you know that would have just given up if they were in Nujood’s shoes?  Would you have given up?  I probably would have.  When times are at the worse they could possibly seem to be, the ones who rise and decide to make a difference are the ones who should be commemorated.  Mr. Mahatma Ghandi, Mr. Nelson Mandela, Mr. Martin Luther King Jr., Ms. Helen Keller, Ms. Rosa Parks, those are all people who fought for something they strongly believed in.  It might not be the same circumstances, but I believe Nujood could, no should be on that list.  You might think why, she only fought for a divorce.  I’ll give it to you straight, you’re wrong.  She fought for not just herself, but for women’s rights.  She might not have made a huge difference in the way people do things in Yemen, but she sure as hell gave a voice to all the young girls who had no say into marrying a man they didn’t even know.  Because of her, many other girls have found their voices and decided to put themselves first.  Nujood is the first child bride in Yemen to win a divorce and because of her; many more were able to gain their lives back.  I am honoured to be reading her biography.